Friday, 27th October 2006 at 2:36 pm

Borat makes his tops 10 checkings list for Americans mens on sexytime

Yagshemash!

It ees Friday, so we keep fare light, yes?

As Borat (a.k.a. Brit comic Sacha Baron Cohen) prepares to scare and bewilder the Americans with the limited release of his film “Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan” over there today, we found an article he wrote for popular men’s magazine Maxim.

In the article, written in his unique Borat vernacular, he conveys invaluable sex tips to American men. A lucky reader could even win a date with a hometown hottie from Borat’s native Kazakhstan. And really, unlike the squat peasant women who have been pulling his carts and limos to his various global premieres, Maxim promises that they will really be attractive.

Here are just a few of our favourite of Borat’s ’sexytime’ hints:

9. Yellow hairs: Everyones, even an Uzbeki, knows that woman has smaller brain than man. Some mens do not know, woman with yellow hairs has smallest brain of all. (So even Borat cracks Blonde jokes!)

6. Erotic physique: If woman do have bosom that is not droop sufficient this can be remedy by attach rocks for 6 month. Miss Kazakhstan Karylgash Atmekova do this and now have beautiful pair that make dangle 1.3 metre. (Attractive! Droopy boobies!)

4. Make smell nice: Ladies like very much man who stench attractive. Ensure pungent chram by not wash at least 15 days before datings.
See the list in full here.

See the first few minutes of Borat’s movie at YouTube. Believe us, it’s worth the extra bytes of bandwidth!