Monday, 17th September 2007 at 11:00 am

The Bleeping Emmys

The show honouring the shows that make it okay for some of us to be square eyes took place in Los Angeles last night.

Apparently the censors just recently received their bleep buttons, because all the liberal bleeping by the hyper conservative Fox Television censors caused dogs all across North America to howl out in pain. Poor Sally Fields hardly got a thank you in! We don’t think she swore. We think she was censored for criticising Bush and Iraq. Because you know, the Americans are the world’s shining example of freedom of speech and all. We suspect they would have bleeped Helen Mirren too - she won Best Actress in a Miniseries or Movie - but they probably didn’t grasp her subtle insult of Americans, which, as a polite Brit, she handed down in a tidily wrapped compliment.

Despite their lazy and anti-climactic fade-to-black-screen ending (which made it so clear that the writers had run out of ideas and which caused their loyal fans of six seasons to rightfully hate them), The Sopranos still scooped up the Best Drama Series Emmy.

America Ferrera won for not really being Ugly. Katherine Heigl won for being pretty.

Heroes’ very own cheerleader in distress only needed saving from the hideous dress she was wearing.

It’s around this time that we fell asleep - and WE WERE NOT EVEN WATCHING!

The folks over at TV Shark.com has the full list of winners.